Monday, November 12, 2007
I had a dream last night....
i had a dream last night. its a song i heard as part of the Beverly Hills 90210 soundtrack.
but i did really have a dream last night... it went something like this : Pakistan had attacked us.... Delhi was trying to fend off a blitzkrieg... we weren't succeeding because all India had to offer in the name of defence were some hundreds of UAVs (unmanned aerial vehicles, generally used for surveillance/reconnaissance), and they were sponsored by Reliance so they were not very conducive to the whole speed, secrecy and stealth business, conspicuous as the were painted with triangles of red and blue!
ok, so they weren't all that useless as they did manage to confuse the Pakistani planes as the latter weaved in and out of the trusty Reliance network. so, now that i have set the stage, i am going to walk in for a cameo... i enter as i am leading a group of people from inside a hospital (which had somehow been wired to explode!) and being the smartass that i usually try to be, i am trying to tell them to run in a zigzag to avoid being hit by a missile (like THAT is gonna happen!), or flying shrapnel (like you can zigzag enough to avoid flying glass and things such like!) so,(and now it gets ugly) ten seconds after i break into a run, i'm hit in the neck by a piece of flat glass (large enough to serve biscuits on) and it lodges itself in my neck. i don't bleed but i know that i am dead.
now for the boring part: the rest of the dream (and it seemed like the rest of the long night), i am like the walking dead, looking all over town for my husband so that i can see he's ok and then in true Bollywood fashion, i can end my life on a half sigh-half sexy gasp, after telling him all the things i don't say when i should, all the while clinging onto precious life, for anywhere between 15 minutes to half an hour (i always have at least THAT much to say to anyone, except on the phone!).
that's it, that's the dream. in real life though, that's how i sometimes feel.... lost. dead, but not bleeding. always looking for something. not knowing what i'll say when i find it.... and then again thats how i feel when i hurt the one person who i go looking for when i'm hurt... like there is a piece of glass lodged inside of me, and no one can see me bleeding, btu i know its there. and it hurts like hell. only this time, i know what i'll say. i'm sorry. i know i'll probably be an ass again. but for now, i am sorry for what is past. and no, i cannot guarantee the future, but i'm sorry. NOW.